sometimes a dance floor boyfriend is exactly what you need
I went out out last week, for the first time in a long while. And yes, was it a very delayed work Christmas party – naturally – and did I get Covid afterwards? Of course! But all the chicest kids do. So I am thrilled to finally be initiated into this sexy club. Whilst sliding my way round an All Bar One (seriously why are the floors always either slippery or sticky here), I bumped into an adonis. Grey roll neck sweater (hot, nerdy, tech energy) but somehow he was also absolutely ripped. Who knew that was possible apart from in Spiderman? Not I! I actually ended up speaking to his friend about love – Italian, bearded, cute – for a while. I can’t really remember what we said, but it was very earnest and he told me he was still very much in love with a girlfriend he’d grown up with. As I left, having trawled around on the floor hunting for my coat, I blew that sweet I–talian a kiss. That was the vibe of the night….
The adonis followed us out. He’d decided to leave at the same time (?), or just come outside for a smoke. I didn’t really care. I was on the hype train of heading to the next bar, the next drink, finding the next human being to get high off of. He found me outside, waiting for the big kids to be done smoking. My friends were ready to leave, and the adonis and I did that thing where you hover, hooked into looking at each other because you’re waiting for the other person to ask for your number, or lean in, to just DO something and (g’bless) my friend just bluntly said “right, ask for her number now, because we’re leaving”. In the end, he came along for the ride.
My favourite kind of night out is a lot of heated dancing and misguided, deep conversations, the ones you have in the smoking area, in the girl’s bathroom, those little flickering moments of sparky something, and you know you’re never going to meet again but you kinda revel in it all the more because you feel totally free to say whatever.
“I was on the hype train of heading to the next bar, the next drink, finding the next human being to get high off of.”
In the in-between time, as we were walking through Soho to the next spot he looked at me and said: “I like you”. And I got the giggles, because how could he POSSIBLY. I didn’t know where this confidence came from. He said “you have kind eyes”, well I could be a massive bitch I retorted, and you’d never know. He didn’t look convinced. It was simple and heady. Childish. Like we’d just built a sand castle together and discovered that both of our favourite colours were blue. We didn’t need further explanation. Just floating off that simple feeling.
Next, We moved onto the salsa club (bad vibes – lots of either uber drunk people or crusty men grinding up against you), then finally some other bar where we could really dance. I have a weakness for guys that are great dancers. I’m a woman of simple tastes, what can I tell you. There’s something SO sexy about it. Nothing gives me the ick faster than a guy dad dancing, but nothing is hotter than someone who moves like he’s so comfortable in his skin and knows exactly how to pull you in, and spin you around and hold you close. And damn this man could move. I was impatient for him to kiss me, and he did. But it didn’t feel like I wanted it to. Like a cheap thrill, I was desperate to lick up the last of the candy floss, but it tasted unexpectedly bitter. I couldn’t help but feel his hands and imagine someone else's, someone that I was stopping my brain from properly visualising. Why’s it always the ones you never quite manage to keep that stay stuck in a feedback loop in your head? I needed a man after midnight and turns out, that was all he was. I just wish that heady feeling had lasted a little longer.
If you’d like to try your luck at finding a sexy adonis on The Sauce (good thing – you can actually see if they’re a dad dancer), then hit this download button ducky.